Date of Meeting: Friday 26th June 2009
Venue: The Patio at Waud Towers
Jeremy (Ex-Chairman) Waud
Charles (Farnsie) Waud
Andrew (Revbollocks) Evans – Mr Minute Taker
Doc (Pilsbury Dough) Watson
Howard (El Fatwah Fat Git) Gooden
Auntie Jane Gooden
Graham (Dangerman) Atkins
Myles (Smiler, who ate all the pies) Waud
John (Dosser) Frenchie, French
Mrs Frenchie, French
Vinnie (the V Man) Kilner
Apologies for absence received from:
Shiners – got lost enroute again!
Steve Waud – had to leave early to carry all his prizes home.
Dudley Stratford – fell asleep on the toilet again.
Jonny Perkins – never made it to the evening bash at Waud Towers because he had a headache
1.The meeting commenced at 12:12 on the patio at Waud Towers. Frenchie delegated the minute taking for the first time in Waud Classic history to young Rev, who seemed to be an appropriate choice after apparently graduating with a 2:1 for Minute Taking out of Nottingham University.
2.The first item on the agenda was whether the committee thought it was a good idea to return to Royal Ashdown for next year’s event. El Fatwah offered an alternative venue, in that maybe it could be possible to put an umbrella upside down on the island of the pond at Waud Towers, and have a chipping competition all day long. The Ex-chair piped up, and thought that this was a bloody stupid idea, as he did not want any rogue golf balls in his brand new pond!
3.It was then realised that Haas was not at the meeting and had not sent his apologies. Possible reasons were that he had gone home in a huff after someone had defaced the bent book! (There was not conclusive evidence of this however!)
4.A number of the senior members of the society then congratulated the Ex Chairman on introducing a lot of young blood into the event. Young Myles then butted in rudely and suggested that there should be some younger puss invited in the evening, so there was something to take to the local nightclub when the old people go to bed!
5.In true Waud Classic style, it again was proposed that there should be some Waud Classic jackets made, and that El Fatwah Gooden and Pilsbury Dough Watson would head up the Jacket Committee. Last year’s Winner and choker this year, Charlie Waud thought the idea was great – though he thought that Howard and Doc were all talk and no action, as the Jacket Committee have failed to produce anything in the past 5 years
6.There was then a brief halt in proceedings to scan Revs notes so far, and it was decided that the notes were illegible, and so Charlie Waud stepped in to try and salvage what was left of the wine drenched drivel that Fat Andy had produced. Ex Minute taker Frenchie then suggested that by the looks of things, anyone could get a 2:1 from Nottingham University, and exams nowadays are not as hard as they used to be ‘back in my day’.
7.There was then a loud fart from the East Side of the table. Howard noted that it smelt very much like one of McWillie’s, but as he was in Ghana it seemed almost impossible that the smell could make its way over here. It then became obvious that the smell was coming from non player Vinnie Kilner, who was giggling away to himself in the corner
8.The Ex-Chairman asked for suggestions for the 30th Anniversary tour. This was a complete waste of time, as it seemed clear that he has made the decision already that we should return to Portugal – and that Scuffer Coutts would be tour manager!
9.Any other business was requested, and as usual there were no useful business to talk of. Harry Gooden appeared from the bushes and immediately told a vulgar and insensitive Michael Jackson joke. This was greeted by fits of laughter by many members of the committee, however Auntie Jane seemed less impressed and told him to ‘Beat it!’
10.The meeting was declared closed at 12.55, and the older attendees were too tired to move from their seats, while the younger contingent ordered taxi’s, and headed out to sniff out some tottie in the local nightclub!
This document is a true and accurate representation of the matters discussed at the Waud Classic 2009 committee meeting.
J. Waud (Ex-Chairman)
A. Evans (Scribe)